Wednesday, 06 April 2005

Ten Musical Moments of Madness

Life in the music department at Hope College very rarely has a dull moment, as I have come to find out. In looking back at this year so far and all the madness that has occurred over the year, here's a list of some of the finer "moments of madness," as I'll call them.

-Moment of Madness No. 1: Dr. Huw Lewis, organ instructor here at Hope shows his political allegiance during his first-year Aural Skills class by whacking Jon Dutchy-name over the head with his rhythm book, calling it a "Democrat smack" and then lightly taps the Major General Music over the head with the same rhythm book, calling that a "Republican tap" in the light of Jon Dutchy-name and the Major General Music attending President Bush's campaign rally at the Ottawa County Fairgrounds.

-Moment of Madness No. 2: Prof. Charles Aschbrenner, piano instructor for just about forever and Dalcroze eurhythmics teacher, asks his first-year students to skip around the room and walk in the rhythm of "Happy Birthday" while conducting in 3/4 time. This moment would be repeated many times for exams and also become a point of pride on Hope's Facebook group, "I Live In Nykerk."

-Moment of Madness No. 3: Christmas Vespers. Just try singing in them. Then you'll know what madness is-a full-concert run through on Friday afternoon, television recording on Saturday morning, two services on Saturday afternoon/evening, and two services on Sunday afternoon/evening.

-Moment of Madness No. 4: Madrigals Feasts. We brought in a PIG'S HEAD while singing the old traditional English tune, "The Boar's Head." Then the drama included a sword fight, which over the course of the two feasts held, broke one of the swordsmen's thumb and gave the other a nasty scratch right over his eye, narrowly missing the eye itself. We even lit the dessert on fire! Okay, so it was figgy pudding with blazing brandy, a Christmas tradition... but still!!!!

-Moment of Madness No. 5: Prof. Linda Strouf, first-year theory professor and scholarship recruitment coordinator, substitutes for Dr. Huw Lewis in his first-year Aural Skills class. Jon Dutchy-name, ready with a zillion questions, exasperates Prof. Strouf to the point where she said she wouldn't listen after gathering that Mr. Dutchy-name was doing this to annoy his professor. In response, the professor stuck her fingers in here and like a ten-year-old, said "La la la la la, I can't hear you, la la la la." When Mr. Dutchy-name opened his mouth to even say one word, the professor broke forth again into "La la la la la la la la."

-Moment of Madness No. 6: Prof. Strouf, on the same day as singing "La la la la la la la" at Mr. Dutchy-name, threatens one Isaac Droscha during Theory IB class. Mr. Droscha had observed the goings-on of "La la la la la la" but in spite of that, decided to pepper his professor with questions after she attempted to make an absolute point. After getting annoyed, she asked in an exasperated voice to the student right at his face, "Do I need to smack you?!"

-Moment of Madness No. 7: Refer to previous blog to see the story about how going to the Grand Rapids Symphony can land you in a shady coffeehouse.

-Moment of Madness No. 8: Delta Omicron April Fool's Concert. Observe as a guy playing an acoustic guitar kicks a couple of boxes pretending to be amps, the world's worst Mozart clarinet concerto, PDQ Bach done by a pair of teachers, one in a Hope sweatshirt and the other in a Calvin sweatshirt, Beethoven played on two recorders at the same time by one guy, another professor playing a clarinet that loses its parts one by one, beginning with the bell and going to the mouthpiece, a girl in a red monkey suit, and one of those cheap Chinese New Year dragon things!

-Moment of Madness No. 9: Some clever junior-level music class rearranges every single table in Nykerk 101 into a circle with the classroom grand piano, lecturn, and overhead projector in the center of the circle. Making no effort to rearrange the layout to its former state, the first-year theory professor simply cries out 20 mins. into the class period, "I can't take this chaos!"

-Moment of Madness No. 10: Dr. Brad Richmond, "that one professor with the eyepatch," threatens to give the College Chorus "the evil eye." He said, "I only have one, but I can still give you the evil eye." Everyone groans and then hysteria breaks forth when he says "I have another eye here in my pocket."

Now who wouldn't want to observe all this?

Comments(4)

Hmmm the evil eye... That brings back such fond memories of my third grade homeroom teacher. She kept her evil eye in the closet by the door and took it out when things were getting crazy.

chickenlittle27

Ah yes, the "evil eye" which (as my father eventually confessed) was just a cheap glass eye. We would all shut right up when she showed us that. However, I think I most identify with the comment "I can't take this chaos." In my case, it is called school..... don't you have papers to write or something?

dorothygale27

That's better....

dorothygale27

In hindsight, I think the most amusing quotation was "Do I need to smack you?!" The whole class erupted into laughter when Prof. Strouf asked Isaac with all sincerity if she needed to smack him. But then, that sort of thing isn't terribly uncommon for our Theory IB class, considering chaos erupts very frequently and that being Prof. Strouf's sarcastic personality.

Major_General_Music