Sunday, 05 November 2006

"You're not alone"

I didn't see it coming. I had gone about my business over the weekend, spending Friday going to Chapel and not class thanks to a music conference in Los Angeles, enjoying lunch with Ross (he's a cool guy, let me tell you). I sang at the Wind Symphony concert and enjoyed every second of it. Who would have thought that I'd get to perform with a concert band despite only studying ten years of piano and two-plus years of voice? And I didn't count on a movie night at Laura and Jeannette's afterward, but that was great too. Have you ever seen Mickey Blue Eyes? It's just a little bit weird, but pretty funny, honestly.

I slept in on Saturday for the first time in what seemed like forever. I went on the hunt for the books I need for my Music Lit research paper (just for the record, I love MeLCAT-they got me a book from Hillsdale in three days) and came back with everything that I intended to find. I watched Jeff & Kristin at their recital. I did a self-analysis for Conducting. I took a longer-than-expected nap (oops). And I enjoyed an evening as a sports fan after almost getting lost, singing the national anthem for the boys on the hockey team and then watching them steamroll Saginaw Valley.

I'm a bit upset I missed Engedi this morning, but when there are no more clean clothes to wear, that's a problem. Thankfully, I got that done along with stuff for Instrumental Methods, Conducting, and Form & Analysis. I called home earlier this afternoon. And I took in The Gathering, so there was a bit of compensation for missing church this morning. Not next Sunday, that's for sure.

Oh yeah, it was Parents' Weekend this weekend. I didn't really notice any of them at first. I was busily doing my own thing, they were busily doing their own thing, and it was fine. Some of them were at the hockey game with their kids on Saturday, but many were probably at the Civic Center watching Nykerk. But I saw a few this morning going to church with their kids, and I found a dad snoozing in the third-floor lounge. There were even a few parents around for The Gathering. I saw them as I was walking to Dimnent.

And that's when it hit me. Despite having great friends here at Hope, and having them even RIGHT NEXT to me in the chapel, I still felt a bit lonely, alone, among so many people. And I suddenly realized why.

I was lonely for my family. I didn't get to see MY parents or MY brother, and I wanted to see them. Suddenly, I missed them TERRIBLY. But why? I've been gone longer than this before and I made it fine. I'm in my third year at Hope. Was this what all the freshmen that have gone to this institution have felt after Orientation ended? Did I just get this feeling of alone-ness put on hold for two years?

I was later reminded by the Holy Spirit that I'm not really alone. He remined me, "You're not alone." I remembered that my Heavenly Father is still with me, even when my parents aren't. That makes me thankful.

Comments(3)

Right on brother, Right no ^_^
For whenever you feel lonely
do not worry for that time will pass
and you wil be with those of whom you love
and the Lord your God is always in your company.
Just say hello =)

TheGoofyKnight

make that top NO an "ON" and we're good to go, lol

TheGoofyKnight

i don't check on knowhope very often these days but I did today and I'm sure glad I did. You sure look like you're rockin' out there!

daleyrachel