Tuesday, 08 May 2007

Say that again...?!

I kept a quote collection again at Hope. Some of these will be quite funny, others won't. They all caught my attention and either amused me, amazed me, or made me smile at some point during the year.

“I saw zero tone painting and I STILL see zero tone painting.”

“I don’t think you could count on the number of one hands how many times I fell asleep today.”

“Use a vowel like how you talk to a baby. ‘Oh little baby, go to sleep. Sleep, baby.’ And then the baby goes ‘WAAAAHHHH!’"

“Hey Tyler, what does “Vie-nna” mean?”

“Tyler, your shirt says VIE-N-N-NA!”

“It’ll be a hair-raising moment, and I don’t mean bringing up rabbits.”

“If Schumann named this piece ‘***,’ then the next one is ‘$*!!’”

“What do you want? Go away!”
“I need a copy of the syllabus for Theory I. I’m meeting with my tutee... oh gosh, that sounds wrong.”(mad laughter)
“Your TOO-tee?”
“Something like that...”

(Chapel Choir retreat)
“Bleagh, what’s that horrible REEK?!"
“SHUT UP!”
“It’s YOU!”

“I’m a copying MACHINE!”
“Actually, THAT’S a copying machine.” (points to the copy machine)

“What do you have there, Christopher?"
“Root beer.”
“Why do you have it?”
“They made me get it against my will.”
“Who did?”
“The voices inside my head!”

(Looking at birds coming back from house church) “Kitty... I mean bird!”

"I want quotes too!"

"I veto that."

“Conducting legato is throwing the quarter. Conducting marcato is throwing the brick.”

“FOTT!”

(D.O. Potluck)
“Peter’s car look like a rollerskate. It’s a clown car!”

(D.O. Potluck)
“I have to leave early.”
“Why?”
“They’re practicing burning down Voorhees.”
“They already did that in the 1970s!”

(During CatchPhrase at the D.O. Potluck)
“It’s what Peter looks like when he gets out of his car!”
“A CLOWN!”

“You’re alive! I thought you died!”
“What gave you THAT idea?”
“Because you never miss Chapel Choir! It’s only the second time you’ve ever missed!”
“Actually, it was my third.”
“Well where were you?”
“I was sick in bed, asleep.”
“See?! You were sick in bed! You NEVER miss; I thought you died. We all thought you died!”
“Everyone? Are you SURE?”
“Yes! We all thought you were dead!”
“Don't worry, I didn't die. I'm feeling much better today and I'm here for Chapel Choir.”
(Announced to the whole Chapel Choir) “Look! He’s ALIVE!”
“Wait, I thought you were dead.”
“Oh, you’re alive!”

“My bowels are aflame!”

“Flat singing makes babies cry!”

“What’s my job in your castle, Chris?”
“YOUR job, Tyler, is when it’s raining, you will go stand outside, with your arms stretched out, and yell ‘It’s RAINING!’ over and over, until it stops.”
“Do I get an umbrella?”
“No.”
(amused laughter)

“Maggie, did you know you know everything?”
“I know everything?! That’s amazing!”

“That’s a good point.”

(D.O. Halloween Party)
“What does a door face look like?”

(D.O. Halloween Party)
“He’s after my bacon!”

“Oh no!”
“What’s wrong?”
“My G-string just broke on my cello!”
“Tyler needs a new G-string!”

“What’s the soup for today?”
“Creamy chicken!”
“Cream OF chicken!”
“Creamy chicken... sounds like a dance.”

“My clustermates are such girly-girls. I don’t what language they speak. It’s like they speak ‘Pink!’”

“Bach wrote a bunch of squirrels!”
“Put it on the Facebook!”
“Oh great...”

“Have you learned to do a good dog bark since getting Cuthbert?”
“Why do you ask?”
“I thought I heard you make a barking sound earlier.”
“GrrrRRRUFF!"

“If I had time, I would cry.”

“I thought I had the tackiest sweater with a Christmas tree, but after seeing yours, I yield you my title.”

“I don’t know who you are, but I love the God you serve.”

“Chelsea! Wait for me!”
“Don’t wait for him! Close the door!”

“This Theory II class smoked us with their compositions.”
“Ah yes, but WE still claim Chelsea and Alana!”

“Go look that up and get back to me, would you?”
“Yes, sir.”
“See, that’s why I like you, Tyler. You respect me.”
“Maybe someday it’ll be genuine!”

“How was your exam?”
“It was terrible.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
“Well, what made it worse was that there were these maintenance guys were working on this duct work in the ceiling and they were dragging around ladders and running these loud air drills.”
“Oh yikes.”
“Yeah, you’d think if they had half a brain like any sensible chimpanzee that they’d wait till after exams to do that.”
“Sensible chimpanzees...?”

“Me and my beard just called you a big pile of butt.”

“So let me see if I’ve got this: you’re saying my sense of humor is the type that says, ‘Right, NOW I suppose you’re going to tell me that you have a pig in your pants.’”
“Yup.”
“And YOUR sense of humor would say, ‘I DO have a pig in my pants! OINKY OINKY OINKY!’”
“Yup.”
“And if I understand your friend Isaac from school, he’d say something like, ‘No, I have an ACCORDION in my pants!’”
(I begin to laugh hysterically)

“Make up vowels.”

“I’m caught like a chicken in the headlights. Oh wow, now I’m mixing metaphors. And those aren’t even metaphors!”

“Tyler Racey and his magical cloud of... HAPPINESS!”

“This doggerel to Haydn is like an 18^th Century version of a MySpace entry.”
“That’s a good comparison!”

“Wait, what’s gestation?”
“It’s like baking a pie.”
“Only the pie’s a baby.”

“You’re alive."
(Another sigh from me)

“You look good, Sam... just from two different outfits."

“Wow, your sister is a lot shorter than you.”
“Sara? Yeah, she keeps herself pretty short."

“I’ll add that to my list of things to do, right after everything else.”

“Peter, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”
“Uh-oh!”
“Tyler, do you have a crush on Peter?”

“Basses, are you C-F’ing it there?”

“God gives grace to the humble–and that’s me.”

“Sometimes, before a concert, I grab my butt, under my robe, and I squeeze it.”

“Pay the bunny, Andrew!”
“Can I finish my song?”
“No. Pay now and shut up.”

(During the riot in New York City) “Well, should we finish the picture?”
“ARE YOU F****** KIDDING ME?!!!?!”

“Meow! Meow! Meowmeow!”
“But that’s a dog...”

“It’s funny... all the girls are saying, ‘No, don’t tell the audience you skipped a page!’ The guys are all going along with it, saying, ‘Go ahead! Make a fool of yourself!’”
“What did our facial expressions say when it happened?”
“I don’t think the audience noticed, but about half of your expressions said, ‘HOLY $***!”

“Watch out for the nanners!”
“How much sleep have you gotten?”
“Not enough... –LAUGH–”

“I’m Hercules!”
“That’s not a princess, you dummy!”

“I won’t be going home until I come home.”
“That’s deep.”

“I’m a musical black hole!”
“You suck.”

“Rob kept saying to the girl, ‘I know what YOU are. Aren’t you going to dance?’ And then her dad walks up, and then he figures out that the girl was a Mennonite and not a Dutch dancer.”
“He seems to the type who steps on conversational landmines, doesn’t he?”
“I’ve never heard someone describe it that way, but it’s perfect.”

Credit for this year's quotes extends to... Curt Aardema, Tori Baar, Josh Bergmans, Abby Bolkema, Jeff Brown, Nik Burkhart, Emily Chapman, Robby Croswell, Amanda Danielson, Mary Davis, John Davisson, Isaac Droscha, Andrew Franks, Maggie Hellner, Dr. Robert Hodson, Steve Horeni, Mari Jo Koedyker, Prof. Jimmy Leach, Max LeBien, Jeannette Lockard, Ben Manting, Matt Minkus, Richard Newman, Lisa Peterson, Prof. Richard Piippo, Jordan Racey, Dr. Julia Randel, Ross Reynolds, Dr. Brad Richmond, Steven Rodriguez, Katie Ross, Briana Sosenheimer, Amanda Spaanstra, Prof. Linda Strouf, Erin Taylor, Chris Turbessi, Paul VanKempen, Peter VanKempen, Pete Vollbrecht, & Allison Walter