Saturday, 24 June 2006

Who is Chuck Norris...?

The Major General Music has some comments in response to all the comments made about Chuck Norris recently. After recently watching Die Hard, the Major General Music has the following to say.

"Chuck who? He can't touch Bruce Willis-he could only dream of being HALF as awesome as Bruce Willis! Anyone who stands in this man's path WILL be neutralized, ground into tiny bits, ceremonially burned, and then the burning ground salted so NOTHING will ever grow there again! Oh yes, you should fear him. He chews up raw lead at breakfast and spits out .50 caliber bullets as an appetizer for lunch! Then he breathes napalm to light the candles at dinner!"

ALL HAIL WILLIS! NONE MAY STAND BEFORE HIS GUN-WIELDING, REPUBLICAN RAGE!!!!!!!! HE BRINGS DEATH TO TERRORISTS, DRUG DEALERS, BANK ROBBERS, AND BAD MEN!!!!!!!

For in the end, there is only smoke trailing from his glorious guns and the corpses of bad men. Where he walks, no bad man can live. Ever. Not even a little bit. No. Not at all.

*Disclaimer: if you believe this or ACTUALLY take this entry seriously, then you must be a Democrat with a small brain. (It's science.) If this is the case, I hope Bruce Willis comes knocking on your door and demolishes you. For being stupid.

Die Hard is an awesome movie. Never fear. He just gets ridiculous when watching whacko explosion movies late at night when he's tired.