Here I Go Again

I'm setting up for another summer at camp.

A different kind.

This summer, I get to be one of the music guys with Casey at chapel. That's not my only job, but when I think of one of the big things I get to do, that's the first thing that comes to mind, among others. I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. I GET TO DO MUSIC with one of my good friends at Center Lake!

I think I'm going to love my job a lot. AGAIN.

I've been at this worship team thing for nine years between vocals and playing at church and at Hope. You'd think I'd feel ready for just about anything when it comes to worship band stuff but I still feel like I'm approaching something brand new.

I was watching a DVD the other day that Pastor Chris loaned me to screen for the church about worship bands. Paul Baloche was the primary teacher on it and one of the things he talked about right at the outset was this idea that in a worship band, being in WORSHIP to God must be the objective. Creating beautiful music and something artistic are absolutely part of the equation, and I firmly believe those are part of worship. In fact, the Psalms talk about playing skillfully to the Lord. Music can be a powerful way to set the mood of people towards thinking about God when maybe they weren't before. And I'll be honest-worshiping God through music is one of my favorite ways to do so.

But that's just it.

I remember once being taught at a worship workshop at church a couple years ago that as a member of a worship band, we have to be worshipers FIRST. As people who lead, we can't ever let it be about ourselves and we have to be just as much a part of the congregation. That's probably my biggest prayer for this summer.

I want to give absolutely everything I can to help make some awesome music for camp. But more importantly, to be a worshiper of our God with everyone that sets foot in the chapel's doors with them.

Rebellious thoughts from camp.

Inadequacy. In some ways, I feel like that's the only way I can describe my summer.

"But Tyler, how on Earth can you feel that way? You've done this before. You've been to college. You went in just finishing a teaching job!"

But that's just it.

I loved my teaching job in Ludington. It was the best thing to happen and I was happy to have a positive experience at the secondary level, work with students that were actually MY kids, teach them about singing, and learn more about teaching (and the challenges I'm still facing). But the one problem that had to do with camp that was that I had to rush right off to Tustin. Don was perfectly okay with this, for which I was very grateful. But in some respects, I thought I was going in unprepared for the next phase of life, which took a lot of twists. Staff training went great and I got to meet the rest of the team and reunite with some old friends. And together, everyone made a pretty good team this year.

Week 1... Junior High Camp in Huron. Pastor Jim Lacy, speaker.
My summer started a LOT like summer 2009 - with junior high boys up at High Point. And it was a great beginning this year-I had an absolutely AMAZING tent of guys, and so did Cameron. We could take them just about anywhere, do just about anything with them because they were game for just about anything. I'm still sad we weren't able to pull off camping out on Sunshine Mountain with them because they totally would have loved it!. They were probably one of the most chill group of junior high guys I've had in a cabin/tent yet.

Cameron had a camper in his tent that totally got all geeked about the Bible studies and loved talking about stuff with me - we had quite a discussion about Revelation 21 before our campfire and God making His dwelling with His people. He got all excited just talking about that and the pure thought of living with God someday on the newly-recreated Earth. I really hope Sonny becomes an SMT-he's totally the kind of person that I could see doing it. I really wish I could have had a chance to talk with him some more, but I couldn't. But talking with my guys about stuff WAS awesome.

Week 2... Junior Camp in Pictured Rock. Pastor Ken Nichols, speaker.
For the first time, I didn't have a long move! But I had to switch tents up at High Point (from Huron to Pictured Rock). And it meant switching mental gears - week 2 was our week where camp was completely loaded with younger kids. Though I was technically working with junior campers, it felt at times like I was counseling Pre Camp for the first time in two years just because of the age of some of my kids (they couldn't be more than 8 or 9) and how needy they were, except all week.

Despite some of the bad stupid moments, it was actually a pretty good cabin (one of the better junior cabins I've had-and I've had some rough ones), I had some hilarious moments with them (the best quote of the summer came from one of my kids doing counselor impressions-"Why don't we just SKIP IT!!"), and one of my boys got saved this week at camp, which is the big reason why we do what we do at camp-starting and renewing relationships with Christ. Not a bad week at all.

Week 3... Junior/Junior High Ranch Camp in Buffalo. Pastor Dave Heyn, speaker.
I made the longest move ever (from High Point to Ranch!). As I made the transition, I was praying/hoping a bit before this week began for a number of reasons. Last year's drama with all the campers the week we had girls and guys at Ranch Camp, plus all the rain that made it tough to be outside (and the c-c-c-COLD!) made for a pretty miserable week. I really, REALLY didn't want a bad week for my kids this year. Thankfully, this week was much sunnier, warmer, and despite PLENTY of interaction between the campers (a lot of these kids are in middle school, and one of my once-junior campers is now taller than me, yikes!), the kids had a good week. And despite an age gap of around 5-6 years between my youngest and oldest campers and a good ten-twelve inches in height between them, all the guys got along very well. The guys were LOUD. The girls were LOUD. But it wasn't a bad kind of loud, as I was talking with Carissa, Michelle, and Ethan. It was just... crazy.

Counseling at Ranch Camp is always special just because we're out away from everything else so the kids tend to bond pretty quickly and I've gotten to know some of these kids over the past, well, now three years. Some of them I've gotten to watch literally grow up (and they're taller than I am now, which is a little scary!) I had some really good talks with my guys this year, I really enjoyed praying with them, and also had a reminder about sometimes service at camp is in the behind-the-scenes rather than the fun, obvious things that staffers do. Mandi reminded me of that in a friendly but very clear way.

(I also saw a lot of my former campers from years past on this week, including my dudes from the TC area from my very first week of counseling - they're junior high campers now too, they're getting tall, and it's reminding me how long I've been doing this.)

-Pause, partial staff exit to Mackinac Island for weekend of mayhem-

Week 4... Senior High Camp with Isaiah and Seth in Squirrel. Pastor Ryan Huebner, speaker.
I was really psyched about this for a number of reasons. First, high school camp was loads of fun last year, I learned a ton from the week, and... well, a little more simply,

1. I was back at MAIN CAMP. That means being near other people and stuff.
   
2. I was with Isaiah (with whom I hadn't counseled since his very first week ever as a CIT back in 2008!) and Seth.
3. A number of my high school campers from last year were back yet again!

But the week wasn't just all kicks and giggles - a nearly stress-free week the year before with high school guys the year before wasn't like that this year. I had one camper who had some additional needs (hence why Seth was also in the cabin) who ended up needing to leave early. I was honest with other staffers that while I was bummed that he couldn't stay, I was also a little relieved with regards to not having the extra stress, and Seth was able to stick around in our cabin and work with the other guys. Speaking of visiting staff, this was again the week for visitors-Austin, Rachel, & Patrick all came back as counselors again and Isaac came ALL the way up from Kansas to visit family and ended up stopping in to see everyone at camp!

The teaching was REALLY good-Pastor Ryan challenged the kids (and made me think about how to make all this stuff real in my own life) and so did my fellow colleagues during their talks to the guys about purity. The time of sharing around the campfire was especially powerful and I really enjoyed how real it was. That, I believe, is one of the positive facets being able to serve the older campers. Even though there's more drama and the issues can get more difficult, we can really attack what's going on in people's lives and say, "Hey. This is what this is. And yeah, it IS tough. The Bible says this. Take joy from that alone. And let's live it like this so we're not going home without some sort of idea of what to do."

-Pause, partial staff exit to Ludington during Family Camp for weekend of rest and mayhem-

Week 5... Junior High Camp in Petoskey. Pastor Scott Gardziella, speaker.
The transition from senior high campers (who really ARE exhausting!) was a bit easier this time around-I had junior high the following week! But to be honest, I was a little dismayed to be back at High Point because... it gets lonely way back where no one goes except us. However, I was with Dan again and Colby too, and since it was a trio of tents, we'd be doing stuff together. I also had some campers that I knew from either having had at camp before or from church, so that was exciting. However, this week was a bit taxing for a number of reasons.

I had some campers that just simply have stuff going on. Others didn't, so the tent dynamic was REALLY dichotomous. And this was where teaching really got intense. Again. I had on my mind a lot of the stuff from Senior High Camp and I wasn't entirely sure how it might play into this week, though I was certain I didn't want to just ignore it, since I knew

1. It's relevant to junior high guys.
2. Ignoring the topics we discussed with during senior high week would NOT be an option. They're part of that whole pie related to what life actually LOOKS LIKE for a Christian who wants to mean what he says about not just praying the prayer to be one and walking away.
   

But how? As it ended up happening, Bible study became the launching point and we took it from there. It ended up working just fine between Bible study, a prayer work that dovetailed into our campfire and a couple of discussions I had with some of the guys. I felt like I wasn't prepared to talk about such heavy, deep topics. I felt downright inadequate, like I was the wrong person. But if I didn't... then I wasn't sure if anyone would. And as I've thought about it, I wish I'D have heard about this kind of stuff at camp and church and youth group than school and health classes. So if we don't talk to these guys about the scary, heavy-hitting topics that we don't like... then who will?

I talked to a couple of core staff during the week, who knew I wasn't doing well-Becky gave me some good advice along the way and said, "Do a heart check, then." She highly recommended spending some time in prayer, in the Word and finding out where I am and getting my brain, my heart, and so on back where it should be-serving Christ, and my campers, right there and then rather than worrying about me. And it made a difference. Despite it being a tougher week, some of the best conversations I had with campers came from this week. And the kids appreciated it.

-Postlude, staff exuent to First Street Beach in Manistee for enough steak to slay an elephant and a night on the sand and the water (and fish throwing!)-

Appendix... with various staff.
Beach times were great. I ate way too much steak, tons of other snacky stuff, drank tons of pop and let out a couple belches that impressed Don and Sue (yes!), and played some pretty epic volleyball with Kristen, Tiki, Jamie, Candace, Mike, and other people I'm forgetting. Saying good-bye was hard as always because as I've personally experienced twice now, I never know when I'll see some of these good friends again. Sometimes it's not for around a year (or more!), as was the case when Isaiah woke me up from a near-sleep as promised when he arrived for staff training. It's tough-the people you serve with become your greatest friends and separation becomes tough, but I think back to what Trygve taught around graduation in 2008 at Hope: "It's not good-bye. It's until we meet again." How true it us, for those of us who are in Christ.

So I came home for the first week of what Center Lake calls "rental" camps, essentially where churches come, do a week-long retreat at camp on their own, and we provide whatever support they need to run camp. Depending on their needs, it might be a little or a lot. I stayed home the first week and... went camping with the visiting family from NJ. The cousins (and so did Uncle Wade!) asked a zillion things about camp, so I finally showed them two weeks of footage from junior high and senior high camps, including testimonials from campers (thanks Isaac, yours really helped sell it!). Allie and Luke asked Uncle Wade point blank, "We want to go to Center Lake next summer!" I'm praying already.

I returned to Center Lake after that week for Valley Family Church's (VFC) rental camp with its middle school & high school youth groups, as I have every year. It was good to see a number of my friends again and to do camp again. Though it's their camp (and their church staff is getting very good at scheduling and running things by now), they still have us help them out with the more intense areas. So it's fun to come back and help out-I like it and I've come to enjoy working with their staff. They're very appreciative and so are the kids. I got to go on possibly the largest boating outing we've ever taken on the Pine River with Don, Jesse, & Monika and I had the privilege of going in the double kayak (the Stalker). Even cooler, I jumped it over a rock, so I can literally say I jumped the Stalker! As an additional bonus, I got to work the guest High Ropes group from Son-Life Camp & Retreat Center down in Wayland on their Outpost trip - (cool aside: their extra-tall staffer got two solid kicks off the Sky Deck with some coaching from Duane on the Giant Swing and almost landed a third!) I figured after this week and one final service at Temple Hill, I'd be done and returning home, but... Duane asked me, "Tyler, what are you doing next week?"
"Um, nothing yet."
"Would you like to work at camp next week?"

And with that, I was set to come back for another week, this time with Woodside Bible Church network out of the Detroit metro area and its kids camp. It was definitely different than VFC but they were also appreciative and I liked working with them too. Lots of time spent in housekeeping (as with the previous week) and at the flying squirrel and climbing tower. And after Thursday's programming was up, I had myself already packed up and ready to go and had to say my good-byes to everyone who was still there. In a way, I was ready to say farewell for the summer but at the same time, it was hard. But then came the whirlwind weekend-Spring Lake, Muskegon, Coopersville, and Holland all in two days for Ben's bachelor party/prayer night, visiting Leah, visiting Ross (and seeing Matt!), and Ben's wedding! Quite a weekend.

So. What did I take away from one and a half weeks of staff training, five weeks of counseling, one week off, two weeks of retreat hosting/housekeeping, and a whirlwind weekend of visiting friends/watching one of my closest friends finally tie the knot with his wife?

1. I felt completely, utterly inadequate to teach my guys on some of the scariest topics that people face. I knew that I had to talk to them about this stuff, and I didn't want to touch any of it with a ten-foot pole. But somehow, despite all my failings (and the fact that God knew I really didn't want to do any of this), it still worked out. I'm not Moses. I'm not Elijah. Or Jeremiah. But my kids still got the point. And it made a difference.
2. I really, REALLY need to know my Bible better. I felt like the parts that I did get through earlier this spring in my attempt to read through in three months I know better than ever. But the rest is still cloudy. And make no mistake, this goal will be a lifelong goal. It's something I know everyone should strive for, but I believe especially as someone who wants to work with kids at youth group and camp that it's possibly even more important.

I don't want my whole summer (because it pretty much has except for a few weeks) to be a gigantic Jesus jolt, as my camper, Darin, rightfully describes it. Yes, I miss my friends and would love to see them all the time. I miss the place called Center Lake Bible Camp. I gladly admit that I miss people that I love. I love the memories.

But as summertime has ended: I take away a resolve to know my Bible better. I REBEL AGAINST IGNORANCE!!!!

SPRING BREAK

It feels like a million years since the last time I've posted anything on this. Mostly because...

Several days after talking to Ben (refer to the previous post), I got a teaching job in the Ludington Area School district for the rest of the year. It's only one class at the middle school. But it's definitely a start, and if it dovetails into a teaching job either in Ludington or somewhere else, it'll be great. And I've had a chance to dip my feet into the water of working with students in middle school drama, middle school choir, and high school choir. It's been an absolute blast. Plus, I get to go with two of the high school singers who will be singing at State Solo & Ensemble in April. So I get a little bit of experience coaching/accompanying them like a voice instructor. My work really is a little bit of everything!

It's had its challenges, working mostly with middle school students, but I enjoy my job.

And on top of that, I had the wonderful surprise of working the final Quiz Bowl meet down in Newaygo. I was a little bummed that I didn't get to moderate, but in working Jordan's room, we made it like the WSCC tourney. Awesome. Plus a little extra cash is nice.

In other news, life in church music never fails to take its twists and turns. "Unfailing Love" with the Paynes was awesome. So was "All Because of Jesus" with Nate & Bob. I'll admit I was a bit frustrated with "Glory" and doing that with Lifted Voice, but it seemed to turn out well. I'm SERIOUSLY looking forward to the planning process/putting together "Desert Song" with the Paynes and everyone else involved. Hopefully it'll be fairly smooth, sound amazing, and most importantly, glorifying to God and minister to everyone who hears the song (yes, I'm geeked!)

And I might be headed to Center Lake for the weekend in April (maybe?!)

Life is good.

Avalanche

More to come later, but a fun weekend of camp with good friends, goofing around at Buffalo Wild Wings, and then talking about theology, and then talking about it a little more with D-Wag is worth blogging. Plus church at Temple Hill was a hoot! I love my church home in Cadillac.

Catching up with Isaiah after too long was a blessing too. I don't know why I have some of the best friends I could ask for between my crew from Hope and everyone at camp, but I really do.

And speaking of Hope, I could be coming there sooner than I expected. More hopefully to follow on that.

RE-post: WHAT is your name?!

Back during Christmas 2008, the Center Lake staffers went crazy with a boomerang survey. I was a part of it, and it was one of the best early Christmas presents I had. One of those warm fuzzies type of things, for sure, but in my mind, it spoke to how working together all summer in the service of Christ deepens your friendships.

So a repost from Facebook that I felt like re-sharing because it's worth doing.

Originally on... Tuesday, December 9, 2008 at 12:25pm

Post your name and I will do each of the following:

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
4. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
5. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
6. I'll ask you something I've always wondered about you.
7. I'll tell you my favorite thing about you.
8. If you play, you MUST want to post this on yours

Jessica Clouse: Oh, oh! Pick me, pick me!

~Jess

Tyler Racey: Jess

1. Those pictures of you from Homecoming 2007 with the crazy-go-nuts curly-whatsits are mesmerizing. The fact that your hair can do that is amazing.
2. "Big Trouble" becaaaaaause... you KNOW you liked it.
3. "What up, BISCUIT?!"
4. InterVarsity at Hope & encounters at the Kletz. I love those super flurries.
5. A duck. They're lovable and feisty. Love the ducks. And be afraid. Be VERY afraid.
6. Did you ever get the urge to go all King Koopa with the stuff in the Kletz on your last day, even if you knew it would get you in all kinds of trouble? Even for fun?
7. You love your students and love teaching them math. Don't stop that and give it some more time... you'll be a fantastic teacher. Just wait and see what God has in store for you.

Heidi Baker: Heidi B

Tyler Racey: Heidi

1. If you're a Trinity Troll, do you get your very own BRIDGE?! AHAHAHAHAHA. Sometimes I slay myself.
2. "If We Are the Body" - Casting Crowns
3. "No one came to camp from my institution, either."
4. AO training and I threw the giant white Fruit Loop to you. You didn't drown! Good times.
5. A real mother goose. She takes care of her babies (the SMTs) while also fully-prepared to put on her boots of buttkicking with them needed.
6. Have you ever had the overwhelming urge to tell the Heidi Baker with IRIS Ministries that she stole your name?
7. You are willing to reach out and love the unloved when others won't.

Isaiah Nichols: Lulz.
Isaiah Nichs

Joy Morin: JOY MORIN. :D

Heidi Baker: awe Tyler that was awsome, thanks! And sometimes I do want to tell the other Heidi Baker that she stole my name...but she had it first...she is a Heidi Baker Heidi Baker's around the world should strive to be like :)

Tyler Racey: Isaiah

1. I'm concerned about your spelling ability when it comes to names of members of the Spheniscidae family. What is a "pengin" anyway?
2. "Oh, Spaghetti" - Heywood Banks
3. "ISAIAH NICHOLS, I'm surprised at you! How could you do something that to our camper, taking his coffee away from him?!"
4. "Your name is Isaiah?" *Inner monologue: That's AWESOME!!!!*
5. A hummingbird. Before you threaten to go all Jet Li on me for a comparison to such a tiny bird... read the response to no. 7.
6. How far do you think we'll send the flip flop before you get it back?
7. A hummingbird spends most of its waking hours in search of food. If they don't, they will die. That's how I see you in your relationship with Christ. You're constantly searching, looking to grow in Him and seeking that which will nourish your spirit.

Isaiah Nichols: Just the other day I was pondering Kenny's coffee addiction... that kid was funny.

Tyler Racey: Joy

1. I'm still waiting to see you play both your horn AND the piano at the same time. Come on, go all Sarah Brown on us!
2. "Sunny and Seventy-Five" - Chelsea Stephenson
3. "Some... peo-ple like sunny and seventy-five!"
4. Well, the first was an encounter in Nykerk. I thought to myself, "So she's Joy Oosterbaan. Yay, I could be good friends with my accompanist!"
5. A cat-not easily taken by surprised and always ready.
6. What are you & Paul doing after graduation?
7. Of all my accompanists, you and I were easily the closest. Part of it was the willingness to work together right away and I think the common bond of being brother and sister in Christ.

Daniel Wagner Jr. d

w
a
g

junior

Isaiah Nichols: WHAT is your favorite color?

Tyler Racey: WHAT is your quest?

Jon Mundinger: WHAT is the air-speed velocity of a coconut laden swallow?

Nate Martin: SchNATE SchMARTIN

Tara Hartley: Tara...

Tyler Racey: Dan

1. What? You helped incite ANOTHER comment war on someone's picture?!
2. Above All - Michael W. Smith (version I own)
3. "I think Tyler's in there..." "REALLY?!" *Bone-crushing hug in mid-sentence*
4. We were talking either with Em and I think maybe Isaiah outside maybe Bear Cabin during Pre-Camp/Orchard Grove Rentals week. I finally asked you, "Yeah, and you are...?" Not at all awkward at all!
5. An OWL. Because I know you stay up LATE.
6. Why did you help let the POKeMON Facebook groups get so out of control? Seriously.
7. Your sense of caring for your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Despite the endless teasing that I saw between you and the other SMTs at camp and the guff everyone took... there's love.

Tyler Racey: Nate

1. The finger mustache.
2. Everlasting God - Lincoln Brewster
3. "Slow it down." "I thought I did." "More!" (We're in agreement :-) )
4. This digs DEEP; remember membership class in Pastor Carlson's office back at WABC? WAY back when Scott and I were in middle school? Yup.
5. A horse - think you can guess why?
6. Who taught you to play the drumset? I've always been a bit curious.
7. I've come to admire your insight since getting to know you at Center Lake this past summer. Your hunger for the Word and desire for others to know Christ is apparent. You'll be great as a counselor next summer, not just as the "fun" counselor but someone who will be great for the kids' spiritual growth as well. I can sense it.

Nate Martin: i think... Bait's number three... i remember that. was that at the church that one day?

and a horse? hmmm, it doesn't take too much thinkin' if i am thinking right...

i actually kinda sorta learned the start up of the whole kit and kaboodle on how the drum set works from my middle school band teacher... maybe seventh grade? my skillz have evolve since then. like from magikarp to gyrados.

Andrew Fleszar: andrew flesheater

Tyler Racey: Tara

1. So there was this one time at Foster School you were laughing your head off/slightly complaining because Mr. Kipp put WAAAY too much ketchup on your burger and you were kind of mad. But laughing too. I thought it was hilarious for some reason. :-)
2. The Locomotion - Grand Funk Railroad (came up on the music player's shuffle!!!!)
3. "The wassail tastes fine, Your Majesty..." *GAAAAAK!!!!*
4. It probably has to do with 2's and 3's at WABC. WAAAY back.
5. A luvvable teddy bear!
6. How did YOU get on the Badger when I failed so many times?!
7. You could make me laugh at the randomest things.

Tyler Racey: Andrew

1. Isaiah almost got his flip-flop home. But our combined efforts, mostly yours, have sent it on a truly amazing journey. A mighty joke thanks you.
2. Something by Eric Whitacre. Pick your favorite. "Lux Aurumque," perhaps?
3. "HI ANDREWWWWWW!"
4. You randomly appeared in Bear Cabin late one night on one of the last nights of staff training and started to talk to Casey Butler and I was like, "Who IS that?"
5. A raccoon. Remember Isaiah's honey jar, you bandit?
6. Do you know who was the first person to cook up the nickname "Flesheater?" Annnnd, if you do, please tell me.
7. You're such a serious thinker, Andrew! It's so refreshing that, despite all the accusations against younger generations, to know people like you that take the Bible seriously. There is still hope for TRUE Christianity with people like you who seek to learn and also listen and understand.

Samantha 曉詩 Tan: sam tan!

Andrew Fleszar: thanks tyler :D
and yeah ben folly first thought of it with wookie :)

Tyler Racey: Sam

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. Police Story 3 - Jackie Chan & Michelle Yeoh.
3. *Broadway songs in Habitat for Humanity Houses*
4. I think I got it right this time! Working on the Habitat for Humanity house in Cadillac AND the overnight camping trip. My thought: This counselor from Malaysia is HILARIOUS!
5. A jaguar. They can make some fierce noises and are fierce themselves. Like you.
6. Are you so free with being so feisty/yelling "SHUT UP!" at your friends? And by that, I mean do they just take it all to mean, "Oh that's just Sam being herself!" and nothing more?
7. Beneath that tough, feisty exterior that gladly matches the likes of Mike Johnson and Nate "Wookie" Woods wit-for-wit, even if you get pushed into Center Lake, you have a heart even bigger for serving others and so much love to give. The campers noticed that. Don't ever let that diminish, Sam. It'll carry you far.

Samantha 曉詩 Tan: 6. i really hope so, tyler. i don't really mean it!
7. thanks tyler (: that made my day.

Bethany Gerstung: Bethany! =]

Tyler Racey: Oops! Sorry Sam, forgot number 1! Ahem.

Mulan. I saw that on the freetime board and was lost till I realized that was a nickname. Silly me.

Tyler Racey: Bethany

1. I still call lifeguard tubes "macaroni noodles" because of you. :-)
2. "You Never Let Go" (OH NO!) - Matt & Beth Redman
3. "Why aren't you all crispy crunchy?!"
4. Hearing the TGS voices during staff training and realizing that you have the uncanny ability to sound just like them. I was in awe. And then, yeah... the fireside skit was side-splitting.
5. A cat. Your facial expressions remind me of a cat's.
6. Are you coming back next summer?! Please yes?!
7. You have the gift of laughter. It worked so marvelously well with the campers this past summer. A lesson we all can learn.

Bethany Gerstung: 6. - I'm really not sure.. =[
7. - Thank you very much... seriously made my day.

Jonathan Britton: ʇuǝɔıɟıuƃɐɯ ǝɥʇ ǝƃɐuʍd uıɐʇdɐɔ

Jonathan Britton: AKA JONATHANZ

Tyler Racey: Jonathan

1. You sometimes type upside down.
2. "Bob" - Weird Al Yankovic
3. "I've missed you Jon!" "I've missed you too, Tyler!" "Uh, Jon?" "I've missed you too, Tyler!" "Uh... Jon?" "I've missed you too, Tyler!"
4. You finally arrived, and I thought, "Wait, another SMT? Who is he?" Kinda inoccuous. If only I knew.
5. A seagull!
6. Why don't YOU peel the onions YOURSELF?!
7. Because... despite the fact that you have that strange gift of being a creeper and can scare the daylights out of me with a hug after not seeing you since August... I see a guy who has the gift of humor and a lot of love for both his friends and the campers. And I see you sharing them both readily and willingly.
8. Come on. You know you want to.

Goodnight stories!

I love telling stories. A LOT.

I discovered REALLY FAST in my first year of counseling at Center Lake there's a bit of a learning curve if I wanted to tell from the same collected works that a lot of the core staff dudes and veteran guy counselors used that I had a bit to learn. So I listened intently with my campers, laughed my head off with them, and then began the stories myself in a sort of Dr. Seuss-meets-Monty Python style that I guess is all my own. Or something like that.

ANYWAY. I was talking to my good bro Austin on Facebook about this and that and we both needed to sign off, and well... read on. I already saved it in a note, but felt this is worth saving here too.

Austin: bedtime story?

Tyler: oh, sure...

"so there i was..."

Austin: nope i found yo numba the camp directory

Tyler: "with naught but a bowie knife, and one batmobile in the australian outback"

Austin: eating lamb chops?

Tyler: of course! grilled to perfection with a side of taipan egg omelet (better to eat the snake eggs before they hatch and bite you, of course)

when all of the sudden, i heard the roar of a kraken!

Austin: THE kraken?

:o:o

Tyler: oh yes! THAT kraken!

Austin: timothy~

!

Tyler: krakens being my mortal enemy, and loving a good challenge, i pulled out my ocarina from the batmobile and began to play music... first zelda's lullaby to lull it into a false sense of security (to make it think i don't know what i'm doing and am just pushing random buttons)

then the song of storms to make it rain, and then that guy starts making the windmill spin too fast, which somehow makes the KRAKEN angry

Austin: (when in fact you are)

Tyler: true!

so there we are, ready to do battle

and then the announcer says, "round one... FIGHT!"

so we're off, doing battle!

Austin: japanese or eastern european announcer?

Tyler: this guy's more japanese-ish

i stick my knife in its little sheath and decide to go for amore direct attack

a few jabs and punches

Austin: and a flick behind the ear!

Tyler: the kraken, he wraps a tentacle laced with suction cups around me, squeezes a few times, and somehow that sends me flying until i hit the invisible wall, -KERSMACK!-

so i decide to throw a nice fireball at him, yelling -HADOKEN!- (cue fireball sound effect)

Austin: (for good measure)

Tyler: krakens obviously don't like chi-based fire

Austin: or chi-based currey

Tyler: (that too)

then the kraken goes for the direct move, smacking me a few times with his lobster claw-like thingses (this is one of those dual-type lobster/squid types)

so then i decide my knife needs some action and roll to see if i successfully can ride the kraken!

i roll a natural 001!

success!

Austin: naturally

Tyler: i land on top of the kraken and roll again for a skill test to see if i can slash at one of the biggest tentacles

success (it must be my day!) (i lost track of the number)

Austin: his nameis franky

Tyler: ah! that's right!

so i slash at his tentacle before just stabbing the knife into the tentacle

the kraken franky, he doesn't like that very much

so i jump off with a nice flip, roll the control pad and press punch and execute a nice dragon punch as he goes for another tentacle squeeze

we trade hits and each slam into the invisible walls

Austin: fighter's destiny!

Tyler: with our damage meters nearing empty, it comes down to one final move...

who will win? me, the australian adventurer? or franky the kraken?!

Austin: quick press up, down, up,up,up,up left kick spin punch

!!!

Tyler: funny... my combo meter was at level 3!!!!

Austin: gnarly...

Tyler: and i pushed that and flew across the screen and flew into the wildest hurricane kick that you ever SAW!!!!

and krakens HATE hurricanes

Austin: KATRINAD!!!

Tyler: the kraken spun around and got kicked over and over, spit flying, claws snapping, suction cups making sucking sounds, and teeth breaking

Austin: or DAVID'D!!!!

Tyler: and when the dust settled, all i could see was a little crayfish scuttling next to a puddle of saltwater

Austin: and a jelly bean!

Tyler: i set him in it, resheathed my bowie knife (which had somehow fallen in the sand), ate the jelly bean (which healed my wounds)

Austin: wounds of might!

Tyler: and drove off in my batmobile, which had been refueled, looking for another challenge

Austin: and the sun set as the crayfish died suddenly of massive hemorrhaging!

Tyler: oh yes, i always forget that part

Austin: lol....awesome thanks for the potential dream fuel bro good night!!

Tyler: no prob - have a good night bud

Not too many stories make me laugh when I re-read them, but this one does.

Fire & Ice

Camp is always leaves me feeling the same way.

I never go there to do the same things as most people. Shortly after Nate and I actually arrived at camp and had spent a little time hanging out with Kiel (I've MISSED him!) and Kris (I've missed her too, but it hasn't been since last May), we figured out housing and then started working.

Which is why STAFF come, right? We're there to help. To love on the campers (237 kids and youth staffers!), give them breakfast, keep the bathrooms from becoming a disaster, and so on.

Or, in some cases, hang out with them. I did that too. And those moments are some of the coolest.

In the sweltering heat of summer, the crisp cool of fall, or the icy cold of winter, I always come home from camp refreshed. I'm tired, as always. But so glad I went.

It was worth it. I hope the other campers and staff felt the same way.

Monday, 23 November 2009

I come home. I go away. I return. I am thankful.

It seems I'm finally home for at least a bit of a longer stretch of time. For a while, I felt like all I ever was doing was spending my weeks doing my thing at home prepping for the weekend and weekends were spent going to camp. Or Holland. Or in one instance, both, which isn't that bad.

I really like seeing my friends and reconnecting with them. I believe that I have some of the greatest friends that I could ask for, and that has been reaffirmed in the past three weekends. I've developed a closer relationship with some of my camp friends as we've studied discipleship together in a Bible study and thought about the persecuted church during the month of November (and in the process, at least personally, developed a greater sense of perspective on thankfulness, especially when we celebrate being thankful for all the things we DO have with one of the biggest feast days of the year). I find a certain sense of irony in that, but I'll reserve my thoughts on that for another post, hopefully.

Staff Reunion was shorter this year, but I think Nate and I made the exact right move in going down to Grand Rapids afterward and then to Holland on Sunday morning. I'm always glad to be at Engedi for church because it's like another church family along with Cornerstone (and now Temple Hill), but this last experience at Engedi now a week ago was special. The service was a baptismal service and Nate and I witnessed something that I think very few people have ever seen. As usual, a number of people had planned on getting baptized, some with extremely powerful testimonies. But perhaps the most interesting was something that no one had necessarily intended, yet God knew all along would happen. It was an impromptu baptism. This gentleman that I didn't even know of came, said he was at home and had this realization that he knew a church was doing baptisms and that he needed to be baptized that morning. And so he went to Engedi and asked to be baptized. The part that brought me, well, joy was the fact that some of the men didn't turn him away because of church policies and Brian didn't either (though he did ask him in front of everyone the same questions about if he knew Jesus died for Him and if he was a Christian and if he wanted to make the public statement of being a new creation and living for Him). And just like with its own close members, the congregation erupted in celebration.

And then there was The Gathering. Shane Claiborne was brought in to speak at Hope College during The Gathering, which was the biggest reason Nate and I stopped in Holland instead of going straight home and meeting Leah and Jessica at Hope. And it was worth it. For all the controversy that supposedly surrounds this man, what he talked about a week ago didn't seem that wrong to me. Shane Claiborne talked about how he lives in a tough neighborhood in Philadelphia and reach out to the kids. How he gets sad when one of them gets hurt, or worse, dies. How he wanted to serve alongside Mother Theresa in Calcutta. And how he keeps a soldier's dogtags, a piece of detonated bomb casing, and bullet casing in his pocket to remember to pray for the suffering. If the American churches are upset because Shane Claiborne wants to pray for those that need help and are hurting or confused and want to know Jesus, then they're getting angry at the wrong person.

While I was at The Gathering on the 15th and this past weekend, I was also reminded of why I loved spending four years at Hope College so much. I jokingly tell high school kids that I know that Hope is one of the best colleges on the planet. But this is one reason why I loved it so much. While I was in Dimnent Chapel waiting with N-Sto and company, I saw Trygve Johnson & Josh Banner talking and I just wanted to talk and say hey mostly because it's hard to catch them and actually TALK. But then when they asked how I was doing, I was honest and said that job stuff is hard and a little discouraging. And instead of being simply sympathetic, Trygve pulled me in and said, "Tyler, let me pray for you. Right now." And we did for something like 5 minutes. That meant a lot. Instead of being one of several thousand alums he's sent off now in his time, it matters to Trygve how I'm REALLY doing even beyond my four years at Hope. To be known and then forgotten is absolutely heartbreaking, but not so at Hope. Not only have I felt like I was SOMEONE with a story rather than just a face, but to know that I have a Dean of the Chapel that would pray for me because I'm discouraged about wanting to teach and can't find the right job yet means so much.

And this past weekend playing for Nate & Caitlin's wedding meant two things. First, I had the pleasure once again of getting to play music for two more of my friends from school on the day when they celebrate the bond of marriage together. That's lots of fun in and of itself, although I always wonder a little if the music will come together and if the music I pick will be okay (thankfully Caitlin & Nate both liked it!). Better yet, it was a time to reunite with TONS of my closest friends from Hope, which is my other favorite part of weddings when they involve my friends from college. It's yet another excuse to hold gigantic parties with way too many people and act silly together. Who knew you could stuff 10 people in a photo booth?! And did I mention I saw BEN at the same iHOP where we did Bible Studs iHOP runs?!

Yes, I'm thankful to be home for a little while. But I'm thankful for four years spent at Hope College, even if it cost money, for the good influences it has had on me. God taught me a lot there through EVERYTHING. And I'm thankful for all the relationship I have there. Gosh, I miss them all so much. I just get to see them and enjoy them for awhile and then I say good-bye again. And I am thankful for music too.

Currently This Is Our God By Hillsong Desert Song see related

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

A much different retreat

So I went back to Center Lake again.

And it was so different this time. Ordinarily, it goes something like this:

-Roll in. Find people.
-HEYYYY!!!!
-Don gives us our instructions, hot chocolate, youth groups roll in, staff meeting, chapel, Taco Bell, and sleep
-Staff meeting, eat breakfast, chapel, hang out, eat lunch, Taco Bell/Caddy run, more hang out, eat dinner, chapel, sleep
-Eat breakfast, chapel, go home exhausted

Not this time. I got to go to Cadillac, sure. But not to hang out with other staffers or to Taco Bell. I didn't get any except as my lunch with N-Sto on our way out of Ludington. This time, the fall retreat was leadership/service-centric.

And I liked it. It was the smallest of Center Lake staff: Duane, Don, Jeff, Penny, D-Wag, Kris, N-Sto, Monika, and me, plus a rotation of staff in the kitchen. And instead of getting to hang out with Kris, N-Sto, and Monika (which I did to some degree), we worked. A lot more than I have on past retreats.

Friday was spent serving root beer floats after chapel. Saturday we were in the staff meeting, working serving breakfast and then getting lunch ready, followed by placements with the different youth groups (the kids from Mona Shores are a blast), and a short break before working in the kitchen again at dinner. And after chapel, N-Sto, Monika, and I were the staff on call for the evening, so... no Taco Bell run again. But it was okay. It was still fun to just hang out with the kids and goof around playing Apples to Apples or pretending to watch television. And Sunday, we helped once again with breakfast (and found our newly-finished screen printed retreat shirts!).

Was I a little surprised by how this retreat looked as a staffer? Oh yes. I had much less down time to play or do what I want, which is what I've been used to. Much more work/getting down and jumping to it, like camp in the summer.

But it's okay. The youth pastors and Pastor Ryan wanted this to be a leadership/service retreat, and I think it was for us all. And I enjoyed it just as much.

Currently Mighty to Save By Hillsong Live From the Inside Out see related

Comments(1)

Major General Music. I miss you. That is all.

Casey

Friday, 06 November 2009

Camp!

The high school fall retreat at camp is coming, and it will be awesome. I think I'd like out of here, for just a little while.

Friends. High school kids. Youth leaders. A pastor. The rock and roll-est worship band I've ever heard. And time with Jesus.

Sounds perfect to me for a fall weekend up north. Mmhmm.

Sunday, 11 October 2009

Whoa, I never talked about CAMP from this summer? UNTHINKABLE!

So I never posted what I noticed at camp or gleaned from another summer at Center Lake. Life as a return staffer is so different, what with knowing life as a staffer. But it never fails to throw surprises at you. First, a brief synopsis. It's a bit like the one in my e-mail.

Week 1... Junior High Camp in Mackinaw. Pastor Ryan Huebner, speaker.
Week 1 was exciting and also a bit nerve-wracking for me as a counselor, as well as three other guys and two girls. None of us had ever counseled without a co-counselor or a CIT or up at High Point, and we were all assigned junior high campers that week up at High Point. But we went on the adventure knowing that God would guide us through it somehow and worked together to make it fun week. Even though I had a rougher tentful of guys in Mackinaw tent, and I was exhausted by the end of the week, one of my boys got saved, which was definitely a highlight of that week.

Week 2... Junior Camp with Nate in Beaver. Pastor Tom Bradley, speaker.
Week 2 was a long-distance move between cabins; after a visit from two great friends over the weekend, I moved way back into main camp to Beaver cabin and transitioned to counseling junior campers with Nate, another counselor (one of my friends from my home church in Ludington!). Even though the week was HOT and the boys felt overheated at times, they did great. A couple kids rededicated their lives to Christ during this week as well, which was exciting!

Week 3... Junior/Junior High Ranch Camp in Buffalo. Pastor Ken Nichols, speaker.
Week 3 meant another long-distance move for me, as well as counseling alone. After a week by myself at High Point, though, I was ready to work at Ranch camp! The biggest obstacle this week had was what week 2 WASN'T-cold and rainy, literally all week. The kids looked like a bunch of bananas in their yellow ponchos on the horses when they were in the riding arena. I only had 5 campers, which made finding them/keeping them together a lot simpler as a counselor. Looking back, even though the week had some ups and downs, I think my boys in Buffalo tent had a positive week at Ranch Camp and learned a lot of what it means to live for Jesus.

Week 4... Senior High Camp with Casey in Woodchuck. Pastor Stephen Cottle (and Doug Olson), speaker.
Week 4 was a completely new experience and yet another long-distance move. I packed up all my things from Ranch just as the rain stopped and the sun came out, finished counseling my smallest cabin ever, and moved way back into the rear of main camp into Woodchuck cabin and prepared for a completely full cabin of 14 high school guys (which is a tight squeeze when you're all pretty much adult size like we were), along with my friend Casey, with whom I had counseled my very first week of counseling ever back in 2008. This in particular, Casey and I were able to hold some deeper Bible studies with these guys and have some truly deep conversations with them about what THEY wanted to discuss, in the whole-cabin and smaller group settings, as well as individually. A lot of campers from this week either re-gave their lives to Christ or made first-time decisions to live for Him, which excited us all greatly.

Week 5... Junior Camp with Austin in Badger. Pastor Troy Gentz, speaker.
Week 5 meant switching gears completely. One of my high school campers was an SMT who became my CIT, but thankfully Austin and I made the switch pretty seamlessly. This cabin of 13 boys (later 12 after one left midway through the week) was a real challenge in terms of management and patience for the two of us. Every night after the kids had gone to bed, Austin and I would step outside the cabin to pray together for them and each other, as well as the rest of the camp and we constantly prayed for patience throughout the week. Neither of us lost patience with the cabin, although in praying for patience, God answered that prayer in a bit different way by TEACHING us about patience. I was completely spent from the week and running completely on the trust that the Holy Spirit would carry me through the end (because I had no strength left). What's even better, at least 3/4 of our cabin told Austin or me that they had either accepted Christ for the first time or rededicated their lives to Him.

I learned more this summer. First off, I think I know what age groups I WANT to teach in school, which is a good thing to know when I'm out there putting in job applications to get a *GASP real, grown-up job.

Second, after my time at camp, I realized that pride isn't a dead issue in my life. I talked about it my testimony to campers, but it's not all sewn up, and I still need help from the Holy Spirit to deal with it.

Thirdly, I wasn't fair with some campers. It's easy when you're either a brand new staffer or know nothing about your campers to give them the benefit of the doubt. However... when you have

1. That SAME camper from last year that made life a NIGHTMARE
2. That camper that isn't BAD but can drive you crazy and has THAT reputation, even if you don't really know him
3. That camper comes from THAT church?!
   

It's easy to cast judgment before even seeing the guys. I wasn't fair to some of them. Regardless if that same camper that DID make your life a nightmare does come back, what's not to say that God worked in his heart and changed him in the past year? I've tried to and still try to do that now. I needed to let others have that same chance, though it DOESN'T mean being naïve.

I also had a camper that commanded a certain reputation. One of the staffers saw one of my rosters one weeks and asked me, "Hey Tyler, how do you feel about having -name of camper- in your cabin?" and admittedly, I was apprehensive. Not only was my pre-conceived judgment way off-target, he ended up being probably one of my favorite campers I've had so far. Despite the bravado he exhibited most of the time, which I saw coming, I saw a different side to my camper that I should have been open to: a real, honest thirst for knowing God and a desire to grow closer to Him.

Finally, I had God teaching me again just a week later when I had a whole cabin populated by one church's children. I was incredibly nervous about this because I knew how some of the children from this church had behaved LAST year while I, dodging the bullet, got to hide out at Ranch Camp with slightly-less rambunctious children. Not so this time, and I took my turn. While Austin and I definitely did have some truly difficult cases, some of these boys were good kids. It just goes to show that every kid is different and you have to treat a person as an individual rather than lumping them into a collective. "You're from WHERE? Oh great." "You're from THAT family? There goes the neighborhood." "You go to WHAT school? Say no more!"

So that's what I've gleaned, in a nutshell. Among the staff, especially Mike to the SMTs, we talked about clinging being joyful in any circumstance and holding fast to what's taught at camp rather than the experience, and I tried to make that clear to my campers, too. One of them said he didn't want it to be a "Jesus jolt" and that's a good way to put it.

I miss camp.

I miss my friends there.

And I can't wait to see them again. But I'm okay. Because I am off the chain, and I am free.

Currently Speaking Louder Than Before (Special Edition) By Jeremy Camp Slow Down Time see related

Tuesday, 25 November 2008

Reaching Out

So I had a conversation that greatly encouraged me last night. It's one of those types that I have to write about.

One of the cool things about Staff Reunion at Center Lake is the opportunity to meet new people. Even staff that haven't worked there for a season or two will come back and meet all the new staff that came for the first time and are back and positively psyched for their first Staff Reunion. And vice versa. It's where we all re-awaken our inner realization that at Center Lake, we're one big happy family.

I never thought Staff Reunion would make this kind of impact on a person. Usually I think only summer camp in this fashion. But I got tagged in a note by a friend that made me realize that even at Staff Reunion, when we welcome guests with open arms, that can impact people in ways we might never know. It can even refresh a person's spirit and encourage him or her to carry on with his or her spiritual walk with a renewed vigor. All because we at Center Lake said, "Come. You're welcome here." And greeted with open arms (literally).

I found out last night that this friend wants to be an SMT at Center Lake next summer. He's gone from a stranger to someone welcomed by the staff to someone who wants to work there on the Summer Missions Team.

God still works in the hearts of young people. Despite the myriad influences on them today, God is still working on their hearts. I have seen it. Because some people bothered with reaching out during Staff Reunion when they were just excited to see each other.

Monday, 24 November 2008

More Than I Bargained For

The call from Mr. Thomas was kind of out of the blue. He asked if I was willing to play for the MCC H.S. production of Cinderella. I thought for a second of La Cenerentola, that opera by Puccini, until he said it was by Rodgers and Hammerstein. A little more reasonable. I didn't have a lot of time to answer, but I asked for a few details and if I might see the music first.

We'd have a full pit orchestra. Three nights of rehearsal so I'd have some familiarity with the music. Not a lot. Three day performances. One for the high school students, one for the middle school students, and one for the elementary school students. Then the two evening performances. The question is, was I up to the challenge?

And... it WAS tough. This score was an orchestral reduction, which are a trick to play. There are more notes than any pianist, no matter how talented, can actually play. It's simply physically impossible to play all of them. It requires reading a ton of notes, distilling them into something that's playable and still sounds like something that the cast will recognize (since my instrument was amplified into the house as well as the stage) and not make TOO many mistakes. The last part, I'm not too sure about but Mr. Thomas was pleased. Together, the pit orchestra pulled it off.

And by God's grace, the jobs are coming in faster now!

-Elementary school program in Muskegon on December 12
-(Follow the Star on December 13 & 14) - NOT MUSIC
-Lifted Voice leads music at church
-Wedding at Church on January 4
-Ludington Campus Life coffehouse on January 9

I'm almost worried I'm going to start double-booking myself soon...

Wednesday, 01 October 2008

Thoughts On Love

No, not that kind. Something much greater. One of the things that I appreciate when I'm at Hope College or Center Lake Bible Camp is that the gathering of believers in one place often invites deep conversations about anything, but especially theology. I soak that stuff in like a sponge. I realize now that wherever I end up once I'm on my own, teacher or whatever, that's something I'm going to seek.

A bit of Center Lake came to Ludington a little over a week ago, and it was a blessing to spend time around my friends, even if we didn't do all that much. One of the things I've seen in this past summer's SMTs is they're thinking, growing, and seeking to grow in Christ. I witnessed at camp a couple times the types of discussions that ordinarily I would only take on with the likes of the Bible Studs, which impressed me. They weren't afraid of the heftier stuff from the Bible and to take on the bigger questions (example: would God love Satan? Oh, and let's talk about why.) and really sit down and think about something, look at the different viewpoints, argue and debate, maybe not necessarily agree, but just THINK. I still laugh the first time Isaiah and Andrew cornered me with that question when I was on break. I definitely didn't finish my letter to Ross that afternoon, but it was one of the best-spent breaks all summer.

It happened again in Ludington-a real whopper of a discussion, with a conversation that actually spilled over into the biggest Facebook message thread I've ever seen. What is love, in the context of Christanity, God, and Christ?

We stayed up too late, talked too long, and wandered too much between topics, and never seemed to find a definitive answer. So what to do? Isaiah and I have what I call the longest Facebook message exchange. It was grand. For simplicity's sake, I'm not going to even try and delineate who came up with what thoughts. It was definitely between two people firing on all cylinders as they thought this through and it was the second time around after an intense discussion between anywhere from three to six or seven people.

Love is a tough to define. Is it an action? A noun? Both? Something different? Something even more nebulous than that? My initial thoughts were to simply look at Christ because as I was reminded by a professor at Hope, the best example of life and how life is supposed to be lived is Christ. He is, after all, the only example we have of what a sinless life looks like. Adam and Eve would have had that, had they not messed it up. The critical difference is, however, Adam and Eve are not God incarnate. Therefore, there is a different dimension of love embodied in Christ and Adam and Eve, had they still been without sin, still could not have possibly known themselves, simply because they are not God. What also makes their love different is the love they had for one another as husband and wife. As a man, Jesus never had a wife. While He DID embody perfect love, it is fair to say that we saw no examples of Him directly loving a woman how a man loves his wife. The closest thing is the love God has for His people, His Church, the Bride. It's even greater than the love two people have for one another, but again... it's still different. So once again, we're back where we started, to the big question: what is love? The great mystery. O magnum mysterium.

The big argument on the beach was action (verb), commitment (noun), or emotion (something possibly between the two). Love is definitely a guarantee as part of God because who He is, as demonstrated by His forgiveness of sinners, with Christ right in the middle. Forgiveness is an action, but what would drive that? Perhaps emotion, but we also have to remember God's emotions are not the same as human emotions. Human emotions can be incredibly impulsive and blow with the wind (think of the temperamental child and you get the picture). Though we don't have a God who is cold as ice and feels no emotions, He isn't like us, either. His wisdom is infinitely greater than ours, so anything with emotions has to be considered differently, though emotions could be considered to drive God's actions (though understanding them is a challenge in and of itself). See how the combination of God's infinite knowledge and wisdom, combined with the emotions operating on a different level makes things difficult?!

Jesus definitely showed emotions in chasing the moneylenders out of the Temple. God was angry when flooding the world when the people were sinning. Then there's commitment... how would that work? By not abandoning His people? He made that promise more than once, both to the Israelites in the Old Testament in Deuteronomy and by Jesus in Matthew. It's pretty clear, and the commitment is whole-hearted. As the Bible shows us, when the Israelites followed His commands, they were blessed. When they turned away, they also were punished. God's commitment is completely there, and it drives His actions, whether it be blessing or judgment.

That said... it's probably so multi-faceted that trying to peg it with any one term is so unfair that it would never do it justice. That and the Bible pretty much gives us the heads up that since it's an attribute of God, it's likely going to be hard to define. Jesus will be a good clue since he taught us HOW to love, but since He Himself is fully God (indeed), and fully human (you better believe it!), well... but since He IS God, we're back where we started. See?! This is tough! Love, as viewed through the lens of Christ, God, and Christianity, is near impossibly to nail down with a good, clear definition.

Another mystery we'll have to be just merely okay with waiting until Heaven to perhaps have the answer revealed. If we bother to ask God while we're there, that is.

Saturday, 26 July 2008

The night my e-mail went crazy.

I used to think that Facebook notifying my e-mail of things was a good thing. Knowing when people commented on photos is a good thing. Knowing when my wall is written on is a good thing. And knowing when people follow my comments is good, too.

What I didn't account for is Trillian. Trillian is the x-factor.

It was July 25, 2008. It was very late at night. I was doing the thing that any high school/college student or recent college graduate might do on a night like this: online chatting. It's normal. Tonight, I was talking to Jon Britton, a friend from camp.

And then it happened. My poor e-mail exploded. It went completely crazy.

11:46 - Kelly Brown makes a comment on one of my photos on the Facebook
11:47 - Alexis Angel tags a photo of me on the Facebook
11:47 - Jon Britton comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:48 - Alexis Angel comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:48 - Jon Britton comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:48 - Jon Britton comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:48 - (I comment on a photo of me on the Facebook)
11:48 - Alexis Angel comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:49 - Alexis Angel comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:49 - (I comment on a photo of me on the Facebook)
11:50 - (I comment on a photo of me on the Facebook)
11:50 - (I comment on a photo of me on the Facebook)
11:51 - Alexis Angel comments on a photo of me on the Facebook
11:52 - Alexis Angel writes on my wall
11:54 - Jon Britton also comments on a note I commented on
11:59 - (I write on Alexis Angel's wall)
12:01 - Alexis Angel writes on my wall

Only Center Lake friends are that talented. Or crazy.

I miss camp.

Monday, 21 July 2008

"Until We Meet Again"

Home.

It's such a strange feeling being home from camp now. Now I REALLY don't know where I belong anymore. Ludington? Holland? Tustin? Somewhere else? And even worse, I don't know what I want to do with my life. I have a Bachelor of Music, Magna Cum Laude, from Hope College, and I don't know how I want to use it anymore. Nothing makes sense anymore.

Going to camp was such an adventure. I wasn't sure how I felt as I drove off to Tustin the first time. I thought at first that maybe I should have applied to Portage Lake Covenant Bible Camp and spent a summer of absolute insanity working with Ross, Maren, & Ashley. That would have been fun, for sure. But I have absolutely no connection to Portage Lake. Center Lake Bible Camp is where I needed to be, even though I really knew absolutely no one except for Dan Wagner, or D-Wag, as we call him. I had to be introduced to absolutely everyone, except him, Don Cochrane, and Duane Whitley. Everyone else was a complete stranger to me.

Staff training was so much fun, though. It was like coming back to college and starting over. I made a ton of new friends, we went through the camp activities way too fast, and I barely had a chance to tell the family that I was enjoying this way too much. And then...

The campers arrived.

"I'M NOT READY FOR THIS!!!!"

I've experienced that feeling too many times to count. I felt it during field placements, my junior recital, probably a few concerts, and student teaching. But like those as well, I actually was. And so was everyone else. I was blessed to have the chance to work with different people every week. It really was a counseling smorgasbord this summer. Looking back...

Week 1... Junior Camp with Casey in Fox. Pastor Ryan Huebner, speaker.
Oh Casey Butler... I was sort of hoping I'd get to spend a week with Casey, and I got him first crack out of the box. Casey and I hit it off right away. I once quoted the infamous "EVIL!!!!" from Ross Reynolds to Casey, and he folded in half from laughter, so I knew this guy was the real deal. In addition to everything I learned about camp counseling from Mike Johnson during staff training, Casey helped teach me what it means to counsel both with humor and with discipline. I always knew he'd back me up and that I could back him up. He also knew the repertoire of camp stories really well and helped teach me those. Oh Grampa C-But... I'm going miss you very much and a lot. Even cooler: I had a camper get saved! It was out in a red canoe on Center Lake!

Week 2... Pre Camp with Jon and Simeon in Bear. (No scheduled speaker).
Pre-Camp is short for a reason. A very good reason. These little munchkins can only handle a short dose of camp before they start to get lonely for home. Or before they go crazy. And the camp staff can only handle them for a short time before they also go crazy. This wasn't the easiest week, to be honest. Poor Jon had a freshly-broken collarbone and wasn't feeling so hot between the pain and the medications to keep the pain in check. Simeon, a CIT, works amazingly well with campers, but there's the whole thing of not leaving a CIT alone with campers. So I had the fun job of effectively counseling Pre-Camp alone with some assistance here and there. I did learn from Simeon how a little humor goes a long way and that a quiet approach still works remarkably well. Especially with needy, clingy campers like the ones we had. Oh Pre-Camp.

Week 3... Junior Camp with Craig in Bobcat. Pastor Aaron Bolduc, Senior High speaker.
Who could forget Bobcat cabin? Everyone's eyes were glued on Bobcat during High School week. High School week is insane enough because of all the extra programming, but this ridiculous cabin made the camp week a bit more spicy. Craig was just the co-counselor I needed to get through this week. No playing on the worship team. A cabinload of kids who liked to argue and wouldn't listen to boot. Craig made sure I kept both feet on the ground and prayed with me when I really needed it. He has a certain personal touch with campers that I sometimes lack, although he showed me that there are some times that you have to admit defeat. That was hard, but like Don taught us during staff training, it might be better to send a camper home as a kid than to see them sent to somewhere a lot more unpleasant when they're older. The lessons learned from being sent home from camp can be significant. Craig reminded me of that.

Week 4... Junior Camp with Chris in Fox. Pastor Ken Nichols, speaker.
Back to Fox, I was the first DIFFERENT counselor Chris had all this camp season. He was looking forward to this week, although this was a challenging week as well. I initially thought this week would be easy with such a small number of campers and a group of kids that initially got along. But as things wore on, the nonstop fighting and drama with the junior high girls really was upsetting. But the cool part I saw with Chris was that as a counselor, you really have to stick to your guns when dealing with these campers. Never, ever back down. It's hard, but it works. And they didn't really have a bad week, in all honesty. In fact, during this week, one of my campers and I had one of the best spiritual conversations I had with a junior camper that didn't turn into a conversion. It was really cool.

Week 5... Junior High Camp with Isaiah in Chipmunk. Pastor Troy Gentz, speaker.
Camp is LOADED with over 200 campers. This week, all the male counselors are working with CITs in the cabins, with the exception of Chris with Wookie next door in Squirrel. I suspected with such a high volume of campers that I'd have a CIT, and I knew exactly who I wanted to work with. And I got my wish-I couldn't have been more thankful to have a CIT like Isaiah. The boys were hilarious, although we had a little bit of turbulence along the way. Honestly, I have to chalk it up to mistakes I made along the way and junior highers acting like junior highers. The really cool thing was that Isaiah and I definitely grew together as friends, brothers in Christ. I really liked sitting down with him at the end of the day and looking Isaiah straight in the eye and asking, "How are you REALLY doing?" talking about it, and then praying together. It was like a miniature Bible Studs, especially after another camper came to Christ. Isaiah and I went absolutely crazy outside the cabin when I told him. It was glorious.

-Intermission, staff exuent for weekend of mayehm in Mackinaw City, St. Ignace, & Mackinac Island-

Week 6... Junior Ranch Camp with Jesse in Buffalo. Pastor Scott Gardziella, speaker.
There are male Ranch Campers! I told Don that if there were male Ranch Campers, I wanted to be their counselor. I got my wish. This week is very full down at main camp, and all the SMTs are out in the cabins with the counselors this week, except for the ranch, where Jesse and I are together (the only senior counselors paired together) and Chantel and Sara are together (a senior and junior counselor). I saw in Jesse possibly the most laid-back and quiet, yet direct method of counseling I've ever seen. It contrasted with my personality, to be sure, but I know the campers bonded with him and I learned from him, like Simeon, that in some cases, less really is more. And depending on the mix of campers, junior campers don't need quite as much attention as I gave them. An important reminder for teaching and for parenting. I love the Ranch. And I got to ride a horse, too! If only Charm hadn't tried to eat along the trail...

-Postlude, staff exuent to Michigan Adventure for evening of madness at the water park and amusement park-

Appendix... with various staff.
We came back to find the first rental group already at Center Lake. I settled down for my first and only night at High Point and went to sleep. In the morning, after very little sleep, I almost decided to not go to church until Andrew asked me if people could take my car to Temple Hill Baptist in Cadillac. I sadly informed them that it was also full of stuff, and then decided I should go to church. We made it in a blistering 15 minutes (shhh), and then a detour through Taco Bell back to camp. The best part: Munchkin party at the Delancey house! I wish I could say I won but I didn't. Thankfully, it was as cutthroat as the playing in Ludington, and the kinds of sneakiness and treachery I've learned from Jordan and Steve served me greatly. Unfortunately, I had to leave after that, but not before a little bit of golf cart racing and saying good-bye.

Good-bye. Good-byes are really hard anywhere you are. They were really hard at Hope College, and they were really hard at Center Lake Bible Camp, too. I'm never sure when I'll see people again, and that feeling makes me a little sick inside. But, as I told a very exhausted and sad-looking Isaiah as he was about to leave, "Remember Isaiah: it's never 'Good-bye.' It's 'until we meet again.'"

And it's true. And it's a beautiful thing. We will meet again. We may not know the day, and it may not be on this earth, but because we're in Christ, I know I can rest assured in these friendships I've made at Center Lake Bible Camp, that I WILL see them again. Because they are in Christ as well.

"Until we meet again..."

Saturday, 14 June 2008

I'll be glad to.

My first week of camp counseling has ended. It was a week of firsts along many fronts.

It was the first time I've been part of a full-fledged worship band as an instrumentalist-vocalist.

It was the first time I've had charge of 7 boys like this. They depended on me to help look after them along every front in some way-physically, emotionally, mentally, and to some degree, spiritually.

It was the first time I've had to deal with a weather-related crisis. Duane almost pounded the door down and told us that we needed to get the campers into the lodge game room with their sleeping bags and pillows because cabins weren't safe.

It was the first time I've had the joys of a flooded cabin. I had to help keep my charges entertained while maintenance and SMTs squeegeed, mopped, and shop-vac'ed the standing water out. Our clean-up theme that day had a cruel sense of irony: the River of Life from Revelation 22.

And it was the first time I've led someone to Christ. I'll never forget that moment as long as I live, I don't think. It happened in the middle of Center Lake, drifting in a red canoe. I never thought I'd be ready, but somehow I was. Washington Avenue/Cornerstone Baptist Church, Engedi Church, Chapel & The Gathering at Hope College, Bible Studs, and everything else I should mention helped make me as ready as I needed to be. And now Heaven rejoices because there's another name in the Book of Life. And even cooler: he asked me to pray for him right before he left CLBC.

I am willing. I'll be glad to.

I can't wait to see what the rest of the summer holds. I think I better hold on tight.

Currently Listening Carried Me: The Worship Project By Jeremy Camp Beautiful One see related

Wednesday, 28 May 2008

Here it comes

I leave for camp tomorrow. Then the adventure begins. And I can't wait.

Yeah, I'll admit I'm just a little scared. It's another unknown. I've never done this. Many of my friends are telling me that it's going to be great and it's going to be exhausting and so many other things. I'm not going to be getting much sleep (been there before... hello student teaching) I'm going to be away from the creature comforts of home. And... it's away from home AND it's not Hope. But I've known that already.

It's all new. It's different. But not entirely, in a way. I know Center Lake. I remember that place. It's an old friend. I remember telling Ross, "Don actually remembers me as a camper! I just hope he doesn't still picture me as an eighth grader going into high school. That'd be weird." My friend gave his usual reaction: something along the lines of "COOL!" and then laughing at me with Maren. I punched Ross, but I let Maren get away with it. Maybe it'll feel like a homecoming of sorts.

Ben gave me an excellent idea to start things off right, and I'm really glad I took his advice. The prayer adopt-a-week has had a great response from a lot of people thus far. Asking people to pray for the camp, the staff, the incoming campers, and for me too was a good idea. Being new to counseling is a good reminder of just what it means to be unable to anything without God... kind of like approaching student teaching. I just hope that I don't grow complacent as the summer carries on. I'm grateful for everyone who's responded to support me. Some of them didn't surprise me at all... and some have, in a way. But I'm glad for all of them.

In a way, what I'm doing just feels right. Maybe it was a little impulsive, but I felt a certain calling, and I'm sure glad I answered. It's going to be great. I can sense it.

Now here's to hoping I don't get lost on my way to Tustin!

Currently Listening Carried Me: The Worship Project By Jeremy Camp Revive Me see related

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

It's over.

My time is up. Student teaching has officially ended, as of Monday night's concert. I said good-bye to over 850 students (who had the most? Did I?), 150 at this concert.

I faced some final frustrations that I didn't expect right up to the end. But that's life, I guess. They still pulled through and Ross and his folks offered some opinions as outsiders that affirmed what I've believed all along about how I taught. I stand behind how I work and although I may have done a few things differently, I don't think I worked with the choirs WRONG.

A few cool thoughts: one student said before the concert, "Good luck, Mr. Racey. I hope you do well."
"I will if you sing for me."
"I will, Mr. Racey!"

And afterwards, another one came up to me and said, "Mr. Racey... are you done?"
"Yeah, I am."
"Hey. Thanks for teaching us in choir."
"My pleasure."

I didn't get to say good-bye at Holland Christian like I wanted, which frustrates me endlessly. I think I was more just torn away, but I guess I made more of an impression than I thought. My prayer is that the students leave this school year and the student-teacher relationship that we formed together better than when we started.

And now, another adventure is about to begin as a camp counselor. Will any of the boys among my 850 students be in my cabin or at Center Lake this summer? Will they face the scenario of having to call me "Tyler" instead of "Mr. Racey?" Only God knows at this point.